Because we’re unemployed cheapskates with plenty of time to kill we broke our own promise never to catch a long distance bus ever again. While Sam and Shaun were happily flying across the channel, we got up early and embarked upon an epic 11 hour Amsterdam to Brussels to Calais to London bus ride.
We couldn’t have planned it any better. We got to the bus early to secure good seats, had plenty of snacks, and planned two movies to fit perfectly within the laptop’s battery life.
Having started the journey at 10:30am, the first seven hours flew by. It was at this point that we started to think that perhaps long distance bus rides weren’t so bad.
Perhaps that was our mistake.
It was at this point that the bus stopped.
We approached Calais to go through customs and cross the channel and that was where we sat, motionless in the most extreme traffic jam you can possibly imagine. It turns out that every Englishman and his dog who had been holidaying in Europe over New Years simultaneously decided to head back home through the Calais tunnel, creating the most horrendous bottle neck.
Without a word of exaggeration we drove 3kms in 3.5 hours.
That was where everything went down hill. We’d eaten all our snacks, the laptop battery ran out, and worst of all, the toilet on the bus was completely blocked.
By the time we arrived back in London, caught the last Tube home and got into bed it was 2am.
Never again will we catch a long distance bus ride.
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